Nervous Excitement

 3 days away…. My surgery is scheduled for Wednesday, and I am feeling a nervous excitement. I am very much looking forward to being able to move past this physical barrier, and start to rebuild.. There is also this butterfly of the unknown. 

I’ve already been told that I won’t have the same capability as before, as the tear I have won’t heal, and there is always the concern of injuring it again. I will be doing my best to keep that in front of me, but not let it deter me. We won’t know of course the movement capabilities until I heal. I know this is the next part of my journey, and I am looking forward to it.

It has been 18 years since I had a surgery, and there is some nervousness of going into that abyss of sleep. I’m older now, and feeling my mortality. I am confident all will be good, but the thought still sneaks in of the ‘what if’. 

I am grateful for this journey I have been given with an injury though. It has taught me many things I don’t believe I would have learned otherwise. Learning to consistently adapt, depending on the day, and pain level, has provided a different insight and perspective to myself. Still being able to progress has a been a key factor in helping to stay positive. 

I am looking forward to seeing you all on the mats again hopefully in a couple of weeks, even if I am only on the bench for a bit. 

Push ups (most modified) - 33,340

Sit ups (most modified) - 32,245

Form reps - Hand 655, weapon 340

AOK’s - 1599

Sparring (modified) - 300

KM’s - 2513

Blogs - 36