Feeling in a Funk

 It feels as if I’ve been in an endless loop of being in a funk the last several weeks. Two blogs written this week were very relevant to me (thank you Todai Ferris and Todai Bauer). As they both write so eloquently and make you feel and know exactly what they are writing, I won’t even try to reiterate in my own words. I keep chasing that level of writing, but will most likely never achieve it, and that’s okay, all I can do is try. 

I’ll start with eating habits. My eating habits have not been great for a couple of years. I go in spurts of healthy eating, but resort back to the norm of not great. I have been doing really well with lunches, but the nighttime habits are not great, and usually abysmal. Yes this is due to late nights, working late, and being short on time. Melinda wrote the points out really well, and for me it is almost exactly the same. I need to make more time to prep the healthier meals/snacks to have at the ready for the late night meal times, and the restricted time to eat. 

Long work days, little energy, lack of sleep, stress of a situation with my son (older one), weight gain, and almost weekly issues with my mom as of late, are all leading me to feel drained. Distant, short tempered, and being easily annoyed are all the side affects I am feeling/seeing in myself which leads to further irritation. Trying to see the positive and being grateful are things I still seek everyday, but they feel fleeting and only pull me out of this funk for a short time. 

I left Thursdays meeting feeling more depressed (I know that wasn’t the intention!) but in my current state of mind, it made me think of how much more I could be doing (one on ones!!), and irritating me that I don’t know where to pull that extra time out of. 

And then I finally had the opportunity to join in on the 2nd degree brown belt class yesterday. This was good medicine (as it usually is). With the busy summer (working 6 of the Saturdays, and trying to take advantage of the warmer months to get outside projects completed) I have missed attending this class. Some great insights I needed to hear, and I’m sure not intentionally for me, but advice that will guide me towards getting out of this mindset. 

I’m already working on making changes at work, which will alleviate a lot of stress, and long work hours. I have a planned call with my son this afternoon, and I will make a point of those healthier food options while grocery shopping today. Weight gain due to injury, menopause, and bad eating habits will be a slower task to tackle, but I need to start somewhere. Small steps, and hopefully positive ones. 

I apologize for the long post, but feel like it helps to provide some direction on changes that need to be made And then the 4 words spoken yesterday, which I needed to hear the most. 

This too shall pass. 

Push ups- 21,250

Sit ups - 21,250

Form reps - Hand 345 Weapon 335

AOK’s - 1075

Sparring (modified) - 475

KM’s - 1078

Blogs - 34